Task1 라이팅 점수 5.0 예시

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Spqs5aEgwAA&list=PLDPk0CoasyhWKq85KcuDMyogpnducpHmz&ab_channel=IELTSEnglishAcademy 

질문이

 

chart below sho average austrailian household. energy use, 라고 써있으니까 이걸 생략하면안됨. 그냥똑같이 단어써줘야함.

 

illustrate percentage 보단 provide a 

 

how much가아니라 the causes of domestic energy use. 어떤식으로 쓰였는가.. 

and greenhouse gas emissions are utilized by Austrailian?

greenhouse gas emissions in an austrailian household. 맞다.

 

 

overview에서 수치 언급함. 전체적인 그래프가 어떻게 생겼ㄴ느지. 나타내야함.

 

 

most of austrailian이 아니라 most austrailians임. 그래멀리에서도 틀렸다고나오네

 

greenhouse gas in order to heating이아니라 in order to provide heating.

 

It also seems that cooling is accounts for ?

 

It also seems that cooling accounts for the lowest portion of both charts.

 

proportion이아니라 portion? 수치가 들어갈때는 proportion이 맞는데 아니니까 portion

 

is account for 둘다 동사임 is뺴라

respectively는 수치에서 나오는거니까

 

아 문법빡세네

 

본문

 

Looking at the charts in more details, water heating is the second highest feature that ordinary people use to their household energy?.먼가이상한데

details에서 s뺴라.

 

highest feature가아니라 원인중에서 두번쨰로 큰거니까 biggest cause.

 

 

biggest cause of household energy.

 

However, we can found water boiling is the largest figure at the household greenhouse gas emissions.

 

-> we can see that ---- figure at이아니라..largest  contributor to 

 

The usage of energy in order to refrigeration make up 7%, 

단수니까.

the use of energy for refrigeration makes up 7%,

 

usage가 사용량인데  use of energy 사용하는거만 말한거잖아.

 

and there is a two-fold in the percentage greenhouse gas emissions at the same part.?

 

이거 다 빼고 it contributed twice as much towards greenhouse gas emissions (at the same part? 이거쓸모 없음)

 

this figure is half the amount that contributes to household greenhouse gas emissions

 

글고 we 쓰면안됨 원래. 그리고 can found가 can 뒤에 동사원형이니까 can find지.

 

내가볼떄는. 뭔가 원어민이 자주쓰는 for to of쓰는거에 익숙하지가 않은거같다.

 

 

그리고 one-second 이딴표현 쓰지말고 그냥 간단하게 숫자깔던가 half 쓰던가해라.

 

The Australian household greenhouse gas emission contain 28% of other appliances as nearly double times of same part of the using energy

 

-> 28% of australian household gas emissions are caused by other appliances which is the amount of energy they use